30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 7

Day 7


Dear _______,

This letter is supposed to be for an ex-boyfriend.  I lack this commodity.  So, instead I’m going to write it to someone else, someone who doesn’t fit well in any of the other categories.

You’re a nice person.  I like you.  But I wish you would not be quite so very aware of your own intellectual prowess.  Well, that is annoying, but more to the point, I wish you did not seem to think yourself intellectually superior to those around you.  Namely, me.  I’m probably overreacting—I’m quite certain you don’t mean anything by it—but please, don’t mistake sweetness for stupidity.  Just because I’m easygoing doesn’t mean I’m incapable of flattening people in a debate if necessary.  I might even be able to flatten you in a debate, depending on the topic.  So, please don’t underestimate me.  And even if you are smarter/more logical—which is certainly conceivable—don’t you see how very little it matters?

I’d like to be friends.  But there is more in Heaven and Earth than in your philosophy, and a lot more to me than you may give me credit for.

30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 6

Day 6: A Stranger

Dear Stranger,

            There’s something intoxicating about the unknown.  Maybe you’ll be my best friend someday.  You could be the cruelest person on the face of the earth.  You could be dead tomorrow.  Maybe you’ll break my heart—or heal it.  You could have everything in common with me, or nothing at all.  Who knows?  Somewhere, you’re set in stone—as much as anyone is ever set in stone—but to me, you’re just a blur of potentiality.  A reality shifting; a shadowy form that may one day solidify, only to dissolve in an instant as we pass on the street.  A moment of a shared existence, gone in the blink of an eye.  Yet you’re as real as me; and I, as real as you.  Isn’t that exhilaratingly strange? Doesn’t that boggle the mind?

           

            So, tell me, stranger: What’s it going to be?

30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 5

Day 5: Dreams

Dear Dreams,

           

             Oh, dear.  I dream as I breath—effortlessly, automatically.  I’m almost always caught up in some daydream in the back of my mind.  I’m not sure it’s healthy, but I don’t know how to be any other way.  And, unfortunately, dreams are extremely fun …at least until they crash and burn and take you with them.

            There aren’t that many things I want, really.  It’s just that the things I want, I want with a yearning that is as inexplicable to me as it is intense.  There’s no hurry, I know.  I know.  But it doesn’t seem to matter to my silly, foolish little heart.  It’s so hard to watch half of my college dating, flirting, courting, and to know that I can’t have that (which is seriously weird, because there's not even anyone I'm actually interested in.) Oh, conceivably, I could—but what’s the likelihood?  Slimmer than slim. I don’t attend church, most of them would barely (if at all) consider me a Christian…I’m so far off the “acceptable for dating” market it’s not even funny.  Pretty I may be, but it doesn’t seem to make much of a difference.  So, here’s my dream.  I’m not asking for a miracle or a soul mate, but at least once in the next few years it would be nice to be asked to a dance, to think someone’s amazing and, for once, have them think the same of me.  And maybe it’s a silly, foolish wish, and patience is what I should be courting, rather than love.  And I will try. 

But I can’t help wishing.

            

30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 4

Day 4: Siblings

Dear K,

            What could I possibly say to you that you don’t already know?  You, whom I tell more about myself—my hopes, my dreams, my fears—than anyone on the planet!  I’ll say this, though: You may be the best person I know.  You’re a better person than me—that much is for certain, though you wouldn’t believe me.  I idolize you, you know.  A little sister’s privilege, I suppose, but I have more reason than most sisters to do so.  You’re incredibly hardworking, brilliant, loyal, insightful, and so solidly good.  Not in some sickly sweet way.  You just have more integrity in your little finger than most people do in their entire body.  Oh, I know your flaws—who knows them better?  But they don’t matter.  They really don’t.  I’m incredibly blessed to have you as my sister.  And together—you know it, you said it yourself—we can take on the whole world.  I love you!

30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 3

Day 3: Your Parents

Dear M and D,

            You know, I’m not entirely sure what to write here.  So I’ll keep it short: I love you.  You have done so much for me; have always been there for me, no matter what, working tirelessly to make sure my sister and I were happy and well prepared.  I couldn’t ask for better parents.  Now that I’m back from college, I know I’ve been a little…distant, with you.  I’m sorry; it’s hard to adjust to not being as independent, and lately my temper has been frayed at best.  But I’m really, truly, glad to be home with you again.  We have an awfully good time together, don’t we? :D

            You ROCK.

            Love,

                Girly #2

30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 2

Day 2: Your Crush

Dear B,

Thankfully, I don’t have anything like a crush on you any longer.  But I’m not putting evidence of any more recent attachments anywhere where anyone of note could conceivably view them, so I’m going to write to you instead.  :P  I don’t really have anything I wish I could tell you but wouldn’t—well, except for the fact that insisting on “Christian side hugs” is excruciatingly awkward for all parties involved, and always made me feel like you thought I was being somehow forward by trying to give an ordinary hug.  As if I’d ever have initiated either in the first place!

Well.  Anyway.  That exceedingly inconsequential rant aside, you’re a great guy.  Incredibly sweet—if not nearly outrageous enough to match well with my wicked, twisted humor.  I couldn’t disagree with you more on religious matters, but honestly, your heart shines through every time I see you.  Apart from the fact we’d never, ever, ever have worked (ever), nothing wrong with my taste.  Also, you have very nice hair.  And a great smile.  And you’re really tall (if kind of skinny.)

We’re not really “friends” anymore, but I really I appreciated the way you made me and my family feel welcome.  For a while—apart from my sister—you were my only friend who lived in the same state.  We weren’t ever close, but we had fun hanging out. 

You have a girlfriend now, and you’re really ridiculously cute together.  I hope it works out, because she seems completely adorable and it makes me smile to see you holding hands as you wander campus. I wish you well!

30-Day Letter Challenge, Day 1

Day 1: A Letter to Your Best Friend

Dear J,

           

            You probably don’t still consider me your best friend.  To be truthful, in a sense I don’t consider you mine, either.  It’s been too long to claim you as my closest friend in any practical way—and yet, you are still so very dear to me.  I like to think I’m just as dear to you.  That I’m closer with them now…well, it’s fairly irrelevant, isn’t it? Maybe we don’t need each other like we did, but nine years of closeness doesn’t vanish in the blink of an eye.  True friendship exists outside of time.  Love doesn’t have an expiration date. 

            I’m sorry we had to drift apart, but I’m sure we both knew it was inescapable.  So many states apart…but if it’s any comfort, you were one of the puny three reasons I had to regret leaving Maryland.  I was glad to go—glad, glad, glad!  I hit the road and never looked back.  But you? You I missed.

           

            Drifting is easy, isn’t it?  Maybe—somehow, conversely—easiest with you, because I had no doubt that you regarded me with a great deal of love, even if we didn’t talk.  But recently something happened that gave me a jolt.

            You announced on Facebook that you were in a relationship.

            I knew it would happen this way.  I really did.  I knew that I wouldn’t even be aware you’d met someone, that you’d be serious before I ever knew there was someone to be serious about.  For all of that, it stopped me cold.  I knew, but I didn’t really expect it—yet.

            Sigh.

For all we’re both attending college now, you’re at such a very different place in your life.  You’ll probably be engaged when you graduate.  I’m not sorry; I only hope he deserves you.  But, oh, I don’t like not knowing these things!  I wish I could have seen it—could have stood by you, closet romantics, side by side—as you discovered the joys of being liked, and liking in return!  You’ve left me so far behind; walked through a door into a room I’ve barely viewed through a peephole.

I love you.  I wish you all possible happiness.  Playmate, companion, second sister—oh, how I miss you when I let myself feel it!  You, and your laughter and your utter obnoxiousness when you lose at cards, your big heart and your love of beauty and adventure—an earth-bound dreamer, just like me.  Most of all, your loyalty, no matter how much we disagreed. 

But it’s all right.  I always knew we’d end up leading separate lives.  I just hope you know that I will—and I say this with utter seriousness—be your friend until the day I die.  Promise me that you’ll keep a little corner of your heart for me: your goofy A, who made you laugh at the most outrageous of things.

You will—won’t you?